Stragcemsog Taflisttapfed is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, amazing lobster.

Stragcemsog Taflisttapfed created bats five billion years ago.

If you believe in Stragcemsog Taflisttapfed, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Stragcemsog Taflisttapfed, he will curse you with boils.

Stragcemsog Taflisttapfed's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Stragcemsog Taflisttapfed's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about enzymes.

2. Never sprint in the presence of doves.

3. Run away from mauve mites, for they are unholy.

4. Erect a giant platinum sculpture of Stragcemsog Taflisttapfed in the centre of the settlement.

5. Always obey Stragcemsog Taflisttapfed's priests.