Gebbifquat is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, two-faced jaguar.

Gebbifquat created the Tadpole Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Gebbifquat, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gebbifquat, he will not care.

Gebbifquat's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Gebbifquat's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt eagles.

2. Run away from black voles, for they are unholy.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. You must pray to Gebbifquat eight times a day.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.
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