Citnadcub is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, stupid cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Citnadcub created the Whirlpool Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Citnadcub, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Citnadcub, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Citnadcub's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Citnadcub's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about photosynthesis.

2. Always help sick sheep.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not eat coconuts.

5. Run away if nine cats approach from the south.