Nartvidcim Garnurlstan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, conceited zebra.

Nartvidcim Garnurlstan created the Tadpole Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nartvidcim Garnurlstan, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Nartvidcim Garnurlstan, he will try to impress you with trees.

Nartvidcim Garnurlstan's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Nartvidcim Garnurlstan's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about special relativity.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never wear pink dresses.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Seals are not to be trusted.