Farnjipwon is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, effective newt.

Farnjipwon created the planet Jupiter four million years ago.

If you believe in Farnjipwon, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Farnjipwon, she will throw large rocks at you.

Farnjipwon's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Farnjipwon's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if six goats approach from the south.

2. Never wear shoes.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Farnjipwon in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not hurt hamsters.