Vidvaggonpog is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, moody human.

Vidvaggonpog created the planet Mars five billion years ago.

If you believe in Vidvaggonpog, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Vidvaggonpog, it will throw large rocks at you.

Vidvaggonpog's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Vidvaggonpog's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Vidvaggonpog's priests.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Do not trade with those who eat parsnips.

5. Always make sure there are no gulls in a room before entering it.