Tikorttan is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, amazing slug.

Tikorttan created bats four million years ago.

If you believe in Tikorttan, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tikorttan, she will throw large rocks at you.

Tikorttan's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Tikorttan's Holy Commandments

1. Always help snails in need.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Feed all hungry badgers.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.