Dabshavkembast is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, unsympathetic badger.

Dabshavkembast created silver three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dabshavkembast, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Dabshavkembast, he will refuse to believe in you.

Dabshavkembast's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Dabshavkembast's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about nucleic acids.

2. Always look after injured great tits.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never mention porpoises.

5. Worship no other gods but Dabshavkembast.