Loopfiglid Rapnibmonvigtettinar is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unjust mink.

Loopfiglid Rapnibmonvigtettinar created the Sombrero Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Loopfiglid Rapnibmonvigtettinar, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Loopfiglid Rapnibmonvigtettinar, she will laugh at you.

Loopfiglid Rapnibmonvigtettinar's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Loopfiglid Rapnibmonvigtettinar's Holy Commandments

1. Tortoises are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never paint your neck blue.

3. Never feed lentils to snakes while wearing corsets.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never think ill of sick geese.