Quartshavnat is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, temperamental lobster.

Quartshavnat created the Black Eye Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quartshavnat, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Quartshavnat, it will turn you into a worm.

Quartshavnat's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Quartshavnat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Hide from violet dogs for they are unholy.

3. Do not shave your head.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Quartshavnat loves mice, so they must be honoured.