Betlapraw Lablimxemham is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, egotistical jaguar.

Betlapraw Lablimxemham created the Sombrero Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Betlapraw Lablimxemham, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Betlapraw Lablimxemham, it will turn you into a frog.

Betlapraw Lablimxemham's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Betlapraw Lablimxemham's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Never think about solid mechanics near capybaras while wearing pink dresses and balancing eight carbon spheres on your neck.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Betlapraw Lablimxemham.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.