Larglaparp is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, bad-tempered fly.

Larglaparp created the planet Mars five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Larglaparp, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Larglaparp, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Larglaparp's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Larglaparp's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your face gray.

2. Never talk about deoxyribonucleic acid.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never talk about fluid mechanics.