Arfbaglid is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, compassionate zebra.

Arfbaglid created time and space nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfbaglid, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Arfbaglid, he will send you a sign.

Arfbaglid's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Arfbaglid's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about ultrasonics near rats while wearing purple scarves and balancing four silicon spheres on your head.

2. Never look at comets.

3. Do not kill aardvarks.

4. Always treat great tits with great respect.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.