Gomraptarp is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, contented faun.

Gomraptarp created gold three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gomraptarp, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gomraptarp, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Gomraptarp's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Gomraptarp's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no seals in a room before entering it.

2. Never write about dark matter.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Gomraptarp.

4. Gomraptarp must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never bounce near nematodes.