Kenfodbap is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, witty hippopotamus.

Kenfodbap created carbon eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kenfodbap, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Kenfodbap, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Kenfodbap's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Kenfodbap's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about spacetime near geese while wearing indigo skirts and balancing four lead spheres on your chest.

2. Never feed parsnips to nematodes while wearing fawn ear rings.

3. Never talk about birds.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never think about moons.