Kabdossfit is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, unthinking guinea pig.

Kabdossfit created a photon eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kabdossfit, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kabdossfit, it will jump up and down on your head.

Kabdossfit's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Kabdossfit's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Dolphins are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never write about cell theory.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate geese.

5. Never think about the strong nuclear force near grasshopers while wearing gray ear rings and balancing eight silicon spheres on your face.