Fabtan is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unthoughtful toad.

Fabtan created a quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Fabtan, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fabtan, she will refuse to believe in you.

Fabtan's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Fabtan's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about gravity.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Fabtan.

4. Do not kill otters.

5. Always make sure there are no monkeys in a building before entering it.