Sakmegfen is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, duplicitous rhinoceros.

Sakmegfen created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Sakmegfen, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Sakmegfen, it will turn you into a rat.

Sakmegfen's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Sakmegfen's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap near voles.

2. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Sakmegfen.