Zagyattfitgov is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, pitiless pig.

Zagyattfitgov created an up quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zagyattfitgov, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Zagyattfitgov, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Zagyattfitgov's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Zagyattfitgov's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always help porpoises in need.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.