Hanbelltetti is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, staggering dolphin.

Hanbelltetti created the Cigar Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hanbelltetti, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hanbelltetti, it will not care.

Hanbelltetti's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Hanbelltetti's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

2. Never talk about dwarf planets.

3. Never paint your arms green.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.