Dumxucbum is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, capable tortoise.

Dumxucbum created the Sombrero Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dumxucbum, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Dumxucbum, he will turn you into a snail.

Dumxucbum's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Dumxucbum's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics near tortoises while wearing gray rings and balancing four lead spheres on your chest.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never mention seals.