Carcenbop is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, omnipotent swan.

Carcenbop created the Tadpole Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Carcenbop, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Carcenbop, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Carcenbop's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Carcenbop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never eat lentils.

3. Do not dye your hair indigo.

4. Always help dogs.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.