Dogfabrutt is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, humane narwhal.

Dogfabrutt created the Sol system eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Dogfabrutt, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Dogfabrutt, he will make you grow a tail.

Dogfabrutt's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Dogfabrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum field theory near doves while wearing blue stockings.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Moths are not to be trusted.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never go into green rooms.