Volhogstikstip is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, duplicitous newt.

Volhogstikstip created the Whirlpool Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Volhogstikstip, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Volhogstikstip, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Volhogstikstip's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Volhogstikstip's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from blue dogs for they are unholy.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always obey Volhogstikstip's priests.

5. Never hop near doves.