Tigfomdinflig is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, amazing narwhal.

Tigfomdinflig created the planet Mars five million years ago.

If you believe in Tigfomdinflig, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Tigfomdinflig, it will boil you in a big pot.

Tigfomdinflig's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Tigfomdinflig's Holy Commandments

1. Tigfomdinflig loves otters, so they must be respected.

2. Always obey Tigfomdinflig's priests.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never feed lemons to great tits while wearing corsets.