Mifyarpominfaslancudbegteen is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, all-knowing seal.

Mifyarpominfaslancudbegteen created humankind seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Mifyarpominfaslancudbegteen, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Mifyarpominfaslancudbegteen, it will turn you into a plant.

Mifyarpominfaslancudbegteen's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Mifyarpominfaslancudbegteen's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never hurt cats.

4. Never wear violet dresses.

5. Never write about archaea.