Dissratgar is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, humorless rhinoceros.

Dissratgar created the planet Mars four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dissratgar, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Dissratgar, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dissratgar's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Dissratgar's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Run away if eight voles approach from the north.