Dibquag is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, confident badger.

Dibquag created the planet Saturn eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dibquag, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dibquag, she will torture you forever.

Dibquag's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Dibquag's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear turquoise jumpers.

2. Retreat if five pigs approach from the north.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never hop near tortoises.

5. Do not take Dibquag's name in vain.