Ominbeddun is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, blissful manatee.

Ominbeddun created viruses nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Ominbeddun, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Ominbeddun, he will turn you into a snail.

Ominbeddun's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Ominbeddun's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick great tits.

2. Never paint your head pink.

3. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Ominbeddun on top of all buildings.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. You must pray to Ominbeddun eight times a day.
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