Godjatkimrenstan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, quiet bat.

Godjatkimrenstan created carbon twelve years ago.

If you believe in Godjatkimrenstan, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Godjatkimrenstan, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Godjatkimrenstan's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Godjatkimrenstan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat beans.

2. Never think about spacetime near ducks while wearing gray stockings and balancing five tin spheres on your chest.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

5. Do not drink alcohol.