Sinmetnat is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, clever narwhal.

Sinmetnat created an atom eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sinmetnat, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Sinmetnat, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Sinmetnat's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Sinmetnat's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not wear yellow clothing.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never look at dwarf planets.