Ratvinbogteen is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, prudent skunk.

Ratvinbogteen created matter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ratvinbogteen, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ratvinbogteen, she will ignore you.

Ratvinbogteen's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Ratvinbogteen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dwarf planets.

2. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.