Bopmatbell is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, unthinking rat.

Bopmatbell created Africa nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bopmatbell, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Bopmatbell, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Bopmatbell's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Bopmatbell's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near frogs while wearing purple jumpers.

4. Do not speak about gooseberries.

5. Pray towards the east.