Nigdanlargcip is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, proud dugong.

Nigdanlargcip created the solar system four million years ago.

If you believe in Nigdanlargcip, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Nigdanlargcip, it will throw large rocks at you.

Nigdanlargcip's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Nigdanlargcip's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. You must never eat turnips.

3. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.

4. Always help nematodes.

5. Never think about quantum field theory near hamsters while wearing black dresses and balancing nine gold spheres on your chest.