Wodmegpang is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, kind camel.

Wodmegpang created life six billion years ago.

If you believe in Wodmegpang, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Wodmegpang, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Wodmegpang's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Wodmegpang's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Run away if nine porpoises approach from the west.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never think about quantum gravity near snails while wearing mauve boots and balancing five zinc spheres on your chest.

5. Never talk about moons.