Bossquimfeb is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, selfish newt.

Bossquimfeb created the Sunflower Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bossquimfeb, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Bossquimfeb, he will destroy your home solar system.

Bossquimfeb's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Bossquimfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never go into pink rooms.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Bossquimfeb on top of all buildings.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.