Govmidsaf is a god.

It takes the form of a large, happy shrew.

Govmidsaf created the solar system eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Govmidsaf, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Govmidsaf, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Govmidsaf's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Govmidsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Govmidsaf loves snakes, so they must be respected.

3. Never think about optics near shrews while wearing indigo rings and balancing three silver spheres on your face.

4. Do not dye your hair black.

5. Never talk about electromagnetism near gulls while wearing magenta shorts and balancing nine platinum spheres on your neck.