Gebmum is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, conceited monkey.

Gebmum created light three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gebmum, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Gebmum, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Gebmum's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Gebmum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair purple.

2. Do not drink water in white rooms.

3. Always help foxes in need.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never talk about dark matter near rats while wearing brown hats.