Hogkemfoss is a god.

She takes the form of a small, temperamental penguin.

Hogkemfoss created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hogkemfoss, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Hogkemfoss, she will remove you from existence.

Hogkemfoss' most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Hogkemfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt nematodes.

2. Never talk about frogs.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Do not take Hogkemfoss' name in vain.

5. Never eat corn.