Moncitsab is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, bad-tempered wren.

Moncitsab created Mount Everest three million years ago.

If you believe in Moncitsab, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Moncitsab, it will torture you forever.

Moncitsab's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Moncitsab's Holy Commandments

1. Moncitsab loves great tits, so they must be honoured.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism near shrews while wearing black coats and balancing nine aluminium spheres on your chest.

3. Never wear mauve skirts.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Always help sick whales.