Vegfombast is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, smart elephant.

Vegfombast created the planet Mars two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vegfombast, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Vegfombast, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Vegfombast's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Vegfombast's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into purple rooms.

2. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a room before entering it.

3. Do not wear tin on your body.

4. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

5. Never paint your back indigo.