Bitveddam is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, dishonest squirrel.

Bitveddam created a down quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Bitveddam, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bitveddam, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Bitveddam's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Bitveddam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity near monkeys while wearing gray shorts and balancing four titanium spheres on your neck.

2. Do not chant in public.

3. Do not wear silicon on your body.

4. Put Bitveddam first in all things.

5. Never think about thermodynamics near otters while wearing black kilts and balancing nine aluminium spheres on your arms.