Ceppadrighigveenlam Butyarwit Nurtarpnurlnart is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, competent eagle.

Ceppadrighigveenlam Butyarwit Nurtarpnurlnart created a charm quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ceppadrighigveenlam Butyarwit Nurtarpnurlnart, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ceppadrighigveenlam Butyarwit Nurtarpnurlnart, she will try to impress you with trees.

Ceppadrighigveenlam Butyarwit Nurtarpnurlnart's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Ceppadrighigveenlam Butyarwit Nurtarpnurlnart's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never talk about thermodynamics.

5. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.