Bellwegtarp is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, two-faced troll.

Bellwegtarp created the Sun seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bellwegtarp, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Bellwegtarp, it will destroy your home solar system.

Bellwegtarp's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Bellwegtarp's Holy Commandments

1. Ducks are not to be trusted.

2. Never think about quantum gravity near frogs while wearing pink stockings and balancing seven titanium spheres on your neck.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

4. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Bellwegtarp on top of all buildings.

5. Never mention hamsters.