Fosstoffoss is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, unjust rat.

Fosstoffoss created the Sun eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fosstoffoss, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Fosstoffoss, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Fosstoffoss' most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Fosstoffoss' Holy Commandments

1. Never go into orange rooms.

2. Do not hurt hamsters.

3. Never think about solid mechanics near voles while wearing yellow skirts and balancing four silver spheres on your neck.

4. Do not kill goats.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.