Nelwigyarl is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, stupid wolf.

Nelwigyarl created everything that exists six million years ago.

If you believe in Nelwigyarl, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Nelwigyarl, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Nelwigyarl's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Nelwigyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five swans approach from the east.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not eat parsnips.

4. Always make sure there are no voles in a building before entering it.

5. Erect three iron sculptures of Nelwigyarl on top of important buildings.