Ragjablikkipvonkap Fobragved is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, ruthless octopus.

Ragjablikkipvonkap Fobragved created the Sol system four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ragjablikkipvonkap Fobragved, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ragjablikkipvonkap Fobragved, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Ragjablikkipvonkap Fobragved's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Ragjablikkipvonkap Fobragved's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about special relativity near monkeys while wearing fawn skirts and balancing four carbon spheres on your head.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never talk about cell theory.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Run away if nine hamsters approach from the north.