Padbemsawmabflydoghig is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, duplicitous tapir.

Padbemsawmabflydoghig created a charm quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Padbemsawmabflydoghig, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Padbemsawmabflydoghig, she will laugh at you.

Padbemsawmabflydoghig's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Padbemsawmabflydoghig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lemons to birds while wearing red trousers.

2. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in blue.

3. Retreat if five aardvarks approach from the west.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Worship no other gods but Padbemsawmabflydoghig.