Wapnibstaf is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, grumpy naga.

Wapnibstaf created an atom eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wapnibstaf, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Wapnibstaf, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Wapnibstaf's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Wapnibstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven tin sculptures of Wapnibstaf on top of important buildings.

2. Do not kill eagles.

3. Never think ill of sick shrews.

4. Never write about archaea.

5. Never feed nuts to snakes while wearing scarves.