Cathubgid is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, wise cow.

Cathubgid created the planet Saturn five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cathubgid, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cathubgid, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Cathubgid's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Cathubgid's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about chromosomes.

2. Always wash your feet before prayer.

3. Do not shave your head.

4. Erect nine silicon sculptures of Cathubgid on top of important buildings.

5. Do not kill cats.